Series 1 Episode 43: Prisoners of Conciergerie

Serial: The Reign of Terror
Episode: 6 (Prisoners of Conciergerie)
Doctor: William Hartnell
Companions: Barbara, Ian, and Susan

Writer: Dennis Spooner
Director: Henric Hirsch
Producer: Verity Lambert
Original Air Date: 12/09/1964

WE SHAMBLE ON THROUGH THIS HELL, TAKING ON MORE SECRETS TO SELL (and other stories)

In which Barbara and the Doctor have more time-traveller chats, Susan finally gets out of jail, Ian goes on a genuinely pointless mission to save a man doomed by history, and the humans meet Napoleon whilst dressed as discount Poldark and Mrs. Miggins.

ALL PRAISE TO THE GREAT ONE, MY DARLINGS ARE THEMSELVES AGAIN! I have never appreciated the intricate mobility of the human face this much. Though I must say, all credit to the animators, who did a fair old job and made the missing episodes actually watchable. Still, it’s wonderful to see the actors themselves in motion.

So the Doctor has apparently betrayed everyone by bringing Lemaitre to Jules’s hideout in exchange for Susan’s release. Seriously, the Doctor would probably murder an old lady with a brick if it meant getting Susan out of danger.

They all stand around awkwardly for a bit while the titles go up, then the conversation starts again. Lemaitre is alone and unarmed, and the Doctor begs them to listen because of the whole Susan situation. When Lemaitre claims to come as a friend, Babs is scathing as hell, but Lemaitre appeals to Ian. Natch. Ian is surprised, but Lemaitre tells him it was he who arranged his escape from jail because he was certain Webster (Ian’s cellmate who snuffed it) gave him a message to deliver to James Stirling. But who is James Stirling?

Insert Spartacus Joke Here

Dun dun dunnnnnn.

I can’t remember whether I was surprised the first time I saw this so honestly can’t comment on the efficacy of the reveal, but he was always a shifty customer.

The Doctor gives precisely zero fucks as to whether this makes any sense or not and just wants to get Susan out of jail. NOW. Stirling says he can use his authority to get them all safe passage to wherever they want to go, and Ian has to grab his Space Bro by the wrist to stop him being the adorably cantankerous bastard he so desperately wants to be in response to all this faffery. I have missed these little touches (figurative and literal).

Anyway, Ian delivers the message that Stirling needs to get back to Blighty with whatever info he has. Apparently Webster mumbled a lot of strange things, but Ian can’t remember them now. Until of course Stirling triggers it by telling them that he needs their help finding out about a meeting with Paul Barras tonight on Robespierre’s orders. Ian remembers Webster saying something about Barras and a meeting and The Sinking Ship, which Jules tells them is an inn and ideal for a meeting. Ok then.

So Stirling’s plan is that Barbara and Ian to attend the meeting, seeing as how he and the Doctor are too recognisable now. Then once he has the info he needs, he’ll be free to help them. The Doctor says it’s nonsense and too risky, which is rather touching. Babs is all for it, and ropes Ian in, too. The Doctor agrees because Susan. Yadda yadda preamble let’s get to the shitty disguises already.

Also, in case anyone thought I'd forgotten about this week's Wildhorn Shoehorn:

(Side note: can Barbara and Ian ride horses? Because apparently The Sinking Ship is a two-hour ride away. Who cares. DRESSUP TIME.)

The moon goes behind a cloud, and thunder crashes, and the sign of The Sinking Ship flaps in the storm. And JOY OF JOYS Barbara is in the world’s most ginormous mob cap that sits on her mighty bouffant like a giant mushroom with frills. Or a jellyfish the size of a large cat. Anyway, Babs is serving Jules wine and making snarky comments about how shitty the trade is in this pub. Apparently they’ve bound and gagged the innkeeper and left him in the wine cellar, which means our faves get to do some play-acting. It’s nearly closing time, and while Babs is running the bar, Ian is busy drilling a hole through the shelves so they can see into the back room from the bar. We know this because Ian is trying to drill through a wine bottle that’s making a clinking noise; Babs, quick on the uptake, moves it to one side before it can attract attention.

Operation 'Tardis Wine Cellar' is go.

In said back room, Ian is resplendent in a Poldark hat; Babs comes in to tell him he’s through, and the two of them back their way back to the bar, into which an important-looking Citizen (Barras) has just walked. Ian is…is he trying to do a French accent? Actually? I don’t know, but he shuffles over to the Citizen and takes his cloak, sounding like the unholy spawn of Maurice Chevalier and assorted Eastenders publicans. He ushers the Citizen into the back room, and Babs comes in to offer him refreshments; she is doing a French accent straight out of the kind of Carry On film that has French maids in it, and ascertains that there will only be two people meeting in the back room. As the other guests leave, Jules too vacates the premises, and Ian tells Barbara that as soon as the other guest comes, she can lock up. Because apparently he is now the landlord boss of her barmaid persona?

The other guy indeed arrives, wrapped in a scarf, and neither Babs nor Ian sees his face as he goes into the back room. But when the guy pops his head around the door of the bar, Ian does see his face and excitedly motions Babs over to him—and tells her it’s Napoleon Bonaparte! HE’S GEEKING OUT SO HARD. Though how can he tell? I’ve seen portraits of Napoleon and literally the only thing I know is that he’s short with a Napoleon hat, and this guy isn’t even that short. Still.

In the back room, Napoleon and Barras talk. It’s long and historical and educational and I’m going to summarise by saying that they plan to arrest Robespierre tomorrow and then execute him without giving him a chance to talk and thereby rally support. He’s basically Saruman after Helm’s Deep. Then Napoleon is going to be in charge of shit. Barbara and Ian eavesdrop. I’m sorry that wasn’t particularly nuanced, but life is too short.

Back at Aristo HQ, Stirling is horrified by the idea of Napoleon as ruler of France. Lol dramatic irony, et cetera. Babs seems to be the one relaying the specifics, seeing as she actually knows the history of the period, so she’ll know about it initially being as one of three consuls and all that. This makes sense, and I approve. Stirling is concerned that Napoleon will rise to greater power, but before Babs et al can be like ‘lol well yeah that’s a thing that happens’, the Doctor cuts in tells him their only concern now is Susan.

Stirling, however, is in agreement with Jules that they don’t want a military dictatorship, and wants to go and try to stop Robespierre being arrested. Babs is gloriously incredulous:

BARBARA: You'd keep Robespierre as ruler of France!?
STIRLING: If I thought it was the only way...
JULES: We need a strong government, but not a military dictatorship. And it could happen.
BARBARA: It will happen!
DOCTOR: Oh, save your breath, my dear. (To Stirling and Jules.) Do as you think fit. I'm going off for Susan.

I adore this. ADORE it. Because obv Babs and the Doctor know that Stirling is trying to shut the stable door after the horse has bolted: Napoleon will be ruler of France, and of course it seems crazy to them that anything else would happen, though of course to Jules and Stirling the future is still indeterminate. It’s rather poignant, actually, in its way. I also adore the continued affinity between the Doctor and Barbara since The Aztecs, after their both having experienced the desire to break the rules and change history. Though Babs clearly doesn’t want to see history changed, it’s still interesting that the Doctor is speaking to her as he did back then as a fellow time-traveller—a novice time-traveller, yes, but still a time-traveller. I also like that this is one of the earliest instances in Classic Who in a historical where we get to the point where history is about to run its course and suddenly everyone disentangles themselves from the plot and essentially gets the engine running for a quick getaway.

Stirling, however, still has the urgency of a man who believes he can alter the course of a history he doesn’t yet know is predetermined, and starts ordering people about: Babs is to wait outside the prison and keep watch while Jules sorts out a getaway carriage for the Doctor and Susan, and Ian is to come with him to try to prevent Robespierre’s arrest. The Doctor tells Ian he may as well go with him if only to make sure Stirling keeps his part of the bargain, and the ‘save Robespierre’ party leaves in a flurry.

Babs tells Ian to take care. And then cracks up laughing:

DOCTOR: What is it? What do you find so amusing, hmm?
BARBARA: Oh, I don't know. Yes, I do. It's this feverish activity to try and stop something that we know is going to happen. Robespierre will be guillotined whatever we do!
DOCTOR: I've told you of our position so often.
BARBARA: Yes, I know. You can't influence or change history. I learnt that lesson with the Aztecs.
DOCTOR: The events will happen, just as they are written. I'm afraid so and we can't stem the tide. But at least we can stop being carried away with the flood! Now, Susan and the prison.

I *love* this. Seasoned time-traveller and novice time-traveller, talking about history, talking about time. As I say, it’s a continuation of the bond they formed during The Aztecs. I love the contrast between the Doctor’s resigned, almost saddened attitude to being unable to stem the tide and Barbara’s new appreciation for the absurdity of it all. It’s a contrast to her profound frustration during The Aztecs, and suggests that this is a natural part of the character development of those who wander in the fourth dimension. She’s still in the giddy stage, apparently. It’s also nice that she’s able to have these moments when her part in history seems absurd to her but it doesn’t counteract her willingness to fight with Ian over the importance of history, even if it can’t be changed. Though it seems there is in fact a difference in the quality of the two kinds of selfishness she encounters in Ian and the Doctor: Ian sides with whoever isn’t trying to kill them in this serial and then makes a moral judgment about what the other side deserves; the Doctor does so without moral judgment and (when he’s with Barbara at least) with a real sense of regret. You do get the feeling that he’s tried to change history before and lost, and that he’s paid a price for it. Which, in my head, may or may not have something to do with his willingness to protect Susan at all costs. I do worry at the slightly ‘fuck it’ attitude Barbara is developing in these matters, but as a time-traveller she’s still very inexperienced, and you get the sense that she’s still going to have to reconcile this giddy fatalism with her sense of what actually matters. And it’s the Doctor who’s going to have to get her through that, not Ian. Character development win.

Barbara, your Jafar is showing.

Back in his office, Robespierre is bolting the doors and going for his gun. Outside, the soldiers are breaking down the door. Robespierre is trying to bluster his way out of it as Stirling and Ian rock up outside the doors; Stirling want to go in, but Ian holds him back; we hear a gunshot. Robespierre is dragged outside with a surprisingly unbloody gunshot wound to the jaw. Stirling asks why Ian held him back, and Ian says Robespierre is finished. They’re taking him to the prison, and now it’s up to the Doctor to get Susan out before they get there.

Outside the prison, a storm is brewing, and the Doctor and Barbara are sheltering under a porch of some sort. They are generally adorable wishing one another luck and safety, and the Doctor goes off to get Susan.

In the prison, everyone is drinking. The Doctor tells the jailer Lemaitre was shot, and tells him that he himself was sent to Paris to ensure Robespierre’s downfall. He gets the jailer arrested for being Lemaitre’s accomplice, tell him he can’t decide whether he’s a rogue or a half-wit or both, and then pretends to give him the benefit of the doubt...then tells him to release the prisoners to ready the cells for Robespierre’s cronies.

Gif by Cleowho

Outside on the porch, Babs is looking on concernedly as violence rages around the prison offscreen; Ian arrives, and she tells them Robespierre’s been taken to the prison. There is casual clinging. Babs tells Stirling where they need to go based on what she remembers from the map. Well, she is their navigator, after all. Ian spots Jules.

Back in prison, Susan is finally let out of jail and tumbles sobbing into her grandfather’s arms. GIVE HER SOMETHING TO DO ALREADY. When he tells her they’ve a carriage waiting, she looks so relieved it only confirms my theory about Gallifreyans being generally allergic to squalor and requiring regular doses of luxury and/or fanciness. They see Robespierre being dragged by, again with his surprisingly bloodless jaw. Pausing only to observe how yesterday everyone lived in fear of Robespierre whereas today they…don’t, he and Susan leave the jail. FINALLY.

Susan is finally out of narrative jail.

Back on the porch, Ian is chatting with Jules; Ian tells him to remember the name Bonaparte. Babs is busy charming Stirling into not asking any more questions about where they’ve come from/where they’re going, despite her knowing how he feels about wanting to see England again. Susan and the Doctor rush on, and Susan hugs her Space Parents; everyone fucks off sharpish. Except Stirling, who has a moment with Jules, in which he speculates that the good people of Team Tardis ‘don’t know where they’re heading for’. Careful, Stirling, the Doctor gets pretty irate at that sort of talk.

There follows some footage of a childishly-drawn map mixed in with stock footage of a carriage rolling along. This means our heroes are Travelling.

And OH AT LAST they’re back in the Tardis. Everyone is half-in, half-out of their eighteenth-century gear, and Susan is playing dressup with the Doctor’s feathered hat. Then this happens:

DOCTOR: Well, I can assure you, my dear Barbara, Napoleon would never have believed you.
IAN: Yes, Doctor, but ah, supposing we had written Napoleon a letter, telling him, you know, some of the things that were going to happen to him.
SUSAN: It wouldn't have made any difference, Ian. He would have forgotten it, or lost it, or thought it was written by a maniac.
BARBARA: I suppose if we'd tried to kill him with a gun, the bullet would have missed him.

Dark shit, Babs. Even if you are being deliciously wry. But then a gorgeous thing happens: the Doctor chides his giggly crew, not just because he’s a grumpy old so-and-so, but because even though they can’t change history, that doesn’t mean that what they do doesn’t matter:

DOCTOR: Our lives are important, at least to us. But as we see, so we learn.
IAN: And what are we going to see and learn next, Doctor?
DOCTOR: Well, unlike the old adage, my boy, our destiny is in the stars, so let's go and search for it.

And there it is! There’s how you reconcile being a time-traveller powerless in the face of history with any sense of self-worth! That’s how you don’t crack up! Even if whatever will be will be, your life is still important, not because of what you do but because of what you see, what you learn, and what you find. And, beautifully, it’s not just the destiny of the Gallifreyans any more—it’s the destiny of all four of them, not trying to get home but trying to find that elusive something else. No, YOU’RE crying.

SQUAD GOALS

WHAT IS THE DESTINY OF TEAM TARDIS? WHERE IN THE STARS WILL THEY FIND IT? WHAT ARE THEY GOING TO SEE AND LEARN NEXT? WILL SUSAN HAVE MORE TO DO IN THE NEXT SEASON OF DOCTOR WHO? DOES NOBODY CARE ABOUT GETTING HOME ANY MORE? MOST IMPORTANTLY OF ALL, DID THEY TAKE A FEW BOTTLES OF DELICIOUS FRENCH WINE ABOARD THE TARDIS?

Summary (as applicable to this episode)

Does it pass the Bechdel test? Only if you're being very, very generous.

Is the gaze problematic? Nope.

Is/are the woman companion(s) dressed 'for the Dads'? No. Though Susan and Barbara finally get to show a bit of clavicle. Scandalous.

Does a woman fall over/twist her ankle (whilst running from peril)? Nope.

Does a woman wander off alone for the sole dramatic purpose of getting into trouble so she can be rescued later? Nope. But Susan's entire dramatic function for the rest of the serial is to be in need of rescue so as to keep using the prison set and keep Team Tardis in the thick of it.

Is/are the woman companion(s) captured? Susan is a continued state of captivity, but there's no actual capturing.

Does the Doctor/a man companion/any other man have to rescue the woman companion(s) from peril? The Doctor has to rescue Susan from prison.

Is a woman placed under threat of actual bodily harm? Ish? I'm assuming they're going to guillotine Susan.

Does a woman have to deal with a sexual predator? Nope.

Is/are the woman companion's/s' first/only reaction(s) to peril gratuitous screaming? No.

Does a woman companion go into hysterics over something reasonably minor? No.

Is a woman 'spared' the ordeal of having to do/witness something unpleasant by a man who makes a decision on her behalf/keeps her deliberately ignorant? No.

Does a man automatically disbelieve or belittle something a woman (companion) says happened to her? No.

Does a man talk over a woman or talk about a woman as though she isn't there? Stirling talks about Babs as though she isn't there when he says she can stand guard outside the prison.

Does the woman companion have to be calmed/comforted by the Doctor/a man companion/a man? No.

Is a woman the first/only person to be (most gratuitously) menaced by the episode's antagonist(s)? Not an enormous amount of menacing this week, but Susan is under most threat.

Is a man shamed into doing/not doing something because the alternative is a woman doing/not doing something? No.

Does the woman companion come up with a plan? No. Though Babs seems to be the only one who knows where the Tardis is parked.

Does the woman companion do something stupid/banal/weird which inspires a man to be a Man with a Plan? No.

Does a woman come up with a theory and is it ridiculed by the Doctor/a man? Yes a teeny bit, when Babs is being glib about bullets bouncing off Napoleon, but it's wry as hell, and the Doctor is ticking them all off for not taking their own importance seriously.

Does a woman call the Doctor out on his bullshit? No.

Does a woman get to be a badass? No.

Is the young, strong, straight, white male lead the person most often in control of the situation? Not really. It's mostly Sitrling and the Doctor.

Is there past/future/alien sexism? Not specific to the past, I wouldn't say.

Does a 'present'-day character call anybody out on past/future/alien sexism? N/A.

Does an past/future/alien person have the hots for a woman companion and is it reciprocated? N/A.

Did a woman write/direct/produce this episode? No/No/Yes.

Verdict

A gorgeous ending to a hit-and-miss serial that has some excellent moments but which I'm unable to forgive for its not knowing what the hell to do with Susan. I adore the continued bond between Barbara and the Doctor following their time-traveller chats in The Aztecs, and am enjoying seeing her character development, even if it's going down the 'everything is absurd, nothing really matters, mama, just killed a man' sort of route. I am also an enormous fan of the Doctor's firm but not unkind attitude to his wayward Space Childrens' flippant remarks about the (un)importance of their actions in the field of human history. His little speech at the end of the episode is really key to his character, and you do feel that this idea of their lives being important to them at least is what keeps him going through that sense of the absurd that we see is beginning to take its toll on the new time travellers. It's a kind of oddly virtuous selfishness that never quite wears off. I'm a little worried about Ian, who does seem to flounder a bit when he isn't playing at being the hero. Identity crisis looming. And Susan. Poor, poor, poor, poor Susan. I wouldn't be surprised if this were the serial that made Carole Ann Ford want to start looking for another job. So, at the end of the first series of Classic Who, Team Tardis is a proper squad, beginning to move towards looking for a collective identity/destiny amongst the stars. How wonderful.